Parenting is one of the most rewarding yet challenging journeys. Over time, different parenting styles have emerged, with gentle parenting and traditional parenting being two of the most commonly discussed. But what sets them apart? Let’s break it down!
What is Gentle Parenting?
Gentle parenting is based on love, respect, empathy, care and understanding. It doesn’t involve fear or control. The main focus of gentle parenting is raising an emotionally intelligent, kind, and empathetic adult. Gentle parenting doesn’t mean you are not setting clear boundaries or letting the child do whatever he or she wants. It means you are politely telling the child what to do and explaining the reason behind everything.
Here is what gentle parenting focuses on:
✔️ Encourages communication and connection
✔️ Uses positive discipline (teaching instead of punishing)
✔️ Helps kids regulate emotions and make decisions
✔️ Builds trust instead of fear
A gentle parent might say, “I understand you’re upset. Let’s talk about how we can fix this together.”
What is Traditional Parenting?
Traditional parenting is more authority-driven, where the parent thinks he is the only authority and the child should do what he or she is told. It focuses on discipline without asking any questions or without caring about the child’s emotions. Discipline is often enforced on the child through punishment or reward.
❌ Emphasizes control over communication
❌ Uses punishments like timeouts or spanking
❌ Expects blind obedience instead of mutual respect
❌ Encourages emotional suppression (e.g., “Stop crying, be strong.”)
A traditional parent might say, “Because I said so!” when a child asks why they need to follow a rule.
Gentle Parenting vs. Traditional Parenting – Key Differences
| Gentle Parenting 🟢 | Traditional Parenting 🔴 |
|---|---|
| Encourages emotional expression 🤗 | Teaches kids to hide emotions 😐 |
| Uses logical consequences 🚦 | Uses punishment & rewards 🎖️❌ |
| Allows children to make choices ✅ | Expects strict obedience 🚫 |
| Builds trust & mutual respect 💛 | Builds authority & control 👨👩👧 |
| Encourages learning from mistakes 📚 | Instills fear of failure 😨 |
Is Gentle Parenting Too Lenient?
It is a misconception that gentle parenting is lenient. It doesn’t say “Let the child do whatever he or she wants”. It tells you to be authoritative with the child and give reasons to the child why the child needs to do what you have asked them to do.
It gives the child an open option to communicate with you, ask you questions, and not be scared of you. I answer around 100 questions per day that my daughter asks. Yes, it is tiring, but in return, she understands things better, she is kind, she can reason, and she knows the difference between right and wrong.
When I need to be strict with her, I am strict with her, she knows she can not get around doing things just her way. She respects us and others. She is empathetic. Many parents here will argue that these are all inherent traits, but I personally feel it is because of gentle parenting.
Authoritative parenting is the best parenting style I recommend and follow. It is a way of gentle parenting.
💡 Gentle parenting still enforces boundaries but in a way that teaches responsibility instead of fear.
Why Gentle Parenting Works
Gentle Parenting has been proved to raise children who:
✔️ Develop higher self-confidence 💪
✔️ Have better emotional intelligence 🤝
✔️ Are more independent & responsible 🎯
✔️ Have a stronger parent-child bond 💕
But make sure you are not over-papmering your child by thinking you are following gentle parenting.
– Be loving but authoritative with your child
– Let them make decisions, but they should know their boundaries
– Hug them and kiss them, but make sure you are firm when required
– If they ask you the reason for the smallest thing, answer them
Related: 15 Positive Parenting Tips!
Remember, gentle parenting is about raising kind and empathetic kids, not pampered kids and apathetic kids.
Which Parenting Style Do You Follow?
Parenting is a journey, and no approach is 100% right or wrong. The best parenting style is one that works for your child and family. But keep in mind the child’s emotions and well-being.
What’s your take on gentle vs. traditional parenting?
Drop a comment below, and let’s discuss! 👇
Must Buy Gentle Parenting Books
Here are 4 must have gentle parenting books.
#GentleParenting #PositiveParenting #RaisingKindKids #ParentingTips #RespectfulParenting #MindfulParenting #ParentingJourney
Related: 30 Parenting quotes: Inspiration and Wisdom for Parents
